I answered as if I was enthralled. I hung onto each and every word that fell from his mouth, he was after all the chosen one set to free me from my boring existence. Ha! The smugness on his face told me everything I needed to know, he was buying my ruse, hook line and sinker. But I'd heard it all before what with his college accomplishments and goals, it was obvious that he wasn't so much a scholar as he was an athlete. Varsity football subsequent scholarship to an Ivy League college. Odds were high that he would go all the way (but only with the assistance of others working overtime to keep his grades and lenient professors under pressure to keep the college's athletic department in good standing) but they were slim to none that he would boast of that same feat after tonight.
”...and then Bruce said...shit, it was hilarious! Vomit was everywhere. I guess you had to have been there...”
Yeah I guess. I was fast shutting off, my eyes were getting tired. It had been a long day and this rendezvous was making it even longer still. Checkered tablecloths and an assortment of black and white images; Sinatra, The Godfather and Al Pacino. Cheap frames littered every conceivable space on the walls. Was Scarface really a caricature to be proud of? I didn't even think the movie was that great though millions would disagree, a new fad was starting to emerge, wannabe's seemed to be emulating their own lifestyles upon that of the powder snorting main characters. Say hello to my little friend. I had my own idea of where this friend in question was most likely located. With every minute that passed I was starting to garner new found respect for actors, this shit was laborious, mentally taxing and mind numbing.
Admittedly any other doe eyed girl of around my age (a low number I offered up when asked) would be more than honored to drop to all fours and render oral services at the drop of a hat but not me. It wasn't that I didn't find Chad attractive, he was, though stunning would be the most likely adjective he would be remembered for. I had other activities in mind for later tonight, none of which included Chad moving his lips, or even him being anywhere close to being conscious.
I get it, you have big muscles and you jerk it to sidelong glances of yourself in the mirror. Would you please just shut up already!
“What was that sweet stuff?”
Fuck did I say my thoughts aloud? What did he just call me? The fuckin' nerve!
It didn't matter now, however, as it was time to act like the 'adventurous and sexually liberated' type. I hated to admit it but this was my favorite part I'd like to think I was getting rather good at playing this part, it wasn't my first rodeo after all. It was the look in the face, only there for but a split second but it was always enough, that made me moist, it was at the exact moment when...
I'm dilly-dallying, I'm excited you see, please accept my apologies (who am I apologizing to and why am I sorry?) I'll get on with it. I don't know why I always have to prime myself up for this. It's just that this is close to the 'instant' for me, the ultimate peak, and the plateau of the night. Though that's not to say that the rest of the night wasn't going to be quite as enjoyable. It was, of that you could be assured. I had grand plans in mind for (parts of) Chad. Enough explaining that which is so unexplainable, it's better to just get down to it, experience the thrill as many advertisements of theme parks were so wont of saying so many years ago when I was a bored youngster looking for anything to do.
Pushing my chair back I lock eyes with Chad. A deplorable, detestable name it reeks of ill begotten dirty money. His parents should be slathered in boiling hot cheese, thrown onto a heaping pile of razor blade edged nacho chips and dropped at the border. Ha! I'm getting whimsical, can you tell I'm nervous and full of girlish excitement? I rise slowly, My gaze is still bored deep into my companion's skull (I can only hope that I emit more of a sexual rather than a predatory vibe) I slink around to his side of the table seductively.
Inwardly I smile as the nonsensical, self-congratulatory garbage previously tumbling from his mouth has stopped altogether. A tilt attaches itself to the edges of his mouth, he thinks he has an idea of what's about to happen. Good. I hope he's also the type that enjoys surprises. Chad's smirk is now blindingly obvious as is the growing bulge in the front of his pants. Placing his hands flat against the edge of the table he pushes back until he registers the slight movement I make that tells him no more.
Merely Inches away I place a hand against his cheek, his flesh is warm to the touch (and why wouldn't it be as the motor that runs his mouth has been running at maximum revolutions since we first took our places at the table). One might think it was Christmas from the look on his face, it was as if he was young again and about to take an early peek at the pile of presents under the tree. It was amazing he was a douche-bag of the highest order but now appeared like an innocent not knowing what was about to happen. If only I could delve into his walnut sized brain to see what he was thinking, was I really that impressive? Or was he really that naive?
My hand meanders from his cheek to the side of his temple then up through his hair. I halt my soft footsteps as I find a spot directly behind his seat. I place my remaining hand on his neck moving it lazily until it comes in contact with the other atop his head. Beneath my touch Chad leans back slightly, his strong muscular throat is bared as his pose becomes more relaxed by the second, his eyes narrow as if he might fall asleep but they are still locked on my own as my fingertips continue to caress his scalp moving seductively through his dark hair in languid, lingering and sensual motions. Chad moans softly. Perhaps I remind him of his mother in some way? I can only dream of what their relationship must have been like. Does Chad feel the need to present and project himself as an alpha male because of an absent father figure? One can only wonder, I try not to, however, as I work toward clearing such thoughts (intriguing as they may be) and others of lesser meaning entirely. The deft movements of my fingertips help as both a relaxing aid for him and for myself. Strange then the location, but it's as if we are alone what with the level of excellent service (again I jest though my nervousness is all but gone) our table has been receiving.
He shivers as a strand of my hair brushes his neck, a chill passes over his skin raising gooseflesh.
“You're delicious.” That got his attention.
As I continue I raise a leg and place my heel on the edge of the table. I'm quite limber you see, Chad comes to the same conclusion as evident in the tent like structure straining to be granted freedom from the zippered fabric cage at the front of his pants, he tugs at it subconsciously. I'd laugh aloud if I were able.
“I'll devour you slowly...” He closes his eyes, his mind is probably reeling in sheer ecstasy with the numerous possibilities. I steal a glance downwards at his neck. A plethora of veins are standing at attention, raised to bursting from the skin, thick cords of blue and green hues. I can virtually smell the life sustaining fluid gushing through his system, “until there's only one part left.” Chad's eyes flicker open.
This is the moment...
With my hands clasped together I yank down at the same exact instant I pull back with my heel emptying the table's surface of all its contents with a raucous clatter.
The sickeningly loud popping noise resulting from the dislocation of Chad's vertebrae is accompanied and somewhat covered by the sound of shattering glass and china, as was my intention. I'm not a genius, but I'll take the compliment, to be honest it was a 'trick' I'd picked up on accident a few years back and it works amazingly well so the question remains why wouldn't I use it again? A mixture of shock and excitement flashes fleetingly across my victim's features, a Kodak moment ending as rapidly as it had appeared. Chad's skull connects with the tile, a crunch that would normally turn a stomach's contents but not this eve as the cacophony arising from the spilled cutlery and utensils is overpowering all.
Knowing I have but a few seconds, probably the fastest the waiter will move in his entire career here, I rush to drag my companion into less of an obvious pose at the same time I run through the tried and true list of apologies for such the same sticky situation.
Sorry, apparently He had one too many; He believed his sense of balance was better and the chair was constructed to stringent OSHA standards
or my favorite and yet to be used...
The fucka' had it coming, treatin' women as merely holes in which to plant his errant seed. Don't worry I'll take him home, string up his worthless carcass, clean it up then cut him into tiny little pieces. The hogs will be overjoyed they haven't seen a decent meal in over a week. I'll be sure to keep one piece for myself though as I might have need for it later, dating is after all tiring work and at least deserved of the tiniest of reward.
With a thud Chad finds a place in the bed of my truck. I take a moment to enjoy the still nighttime air and the silence before I cover his form with bags groceries (it's been a hell of a day), the truck's spare and a large bag of mulch. It was a long ride home but I can't help but smile as I think of all the fun I will be having with my new friend.